Warning: You may not be able to read this entire blog at once, so, like fasting: take your time!
Day 1: May 5th
Yesterday I began my fast. I went to Wal-Mart and purchased a Juicer. The last juicer I had was kind of old and I felt it was definitely time for a new one. I'm about 215-220 pounds give or take, I'm not fat but more 'Tyson mid 80's' solid. When I was weighing 175 I was running 10 miles a day and maxing out at 15 miles once a week. The Last time I weighed 175 pounds I was understanding power years old, six years have elapsed and now I'm 40 pounds away from what I feel is my ideal weight and miles away from peak conditioning. I would love to get down to 175 again. At 5'9 and a half-175pounds would be my ideal size. I feel real good at that size. I got aches and pains at 215, and a lot of it is job related, and from what I hear fasting can reduce aches and pains drastically.
I never reached marathon level shape because I developed bone spurs at the tip of my toe next to my big toe. The pain was incredible and caused me to stop running for six months. The pain in just one toe stopped me from reaching that marathon distance of 26.2 miles. The pain at the tip of my toe was unbearable for nearly six months so much so, that I dreaded small things like putting on a shoe.
At 41 I'd like to get down to 175 pounds again and reconnect with my past level of physical conditioning. The toe is better, tougher and stronger. My job has allowed me to grow in physical strength, but it's 'work'-strength-not 'working-out', exercise strength. And most certainly my job has not allowed me to grow health wise. Working in a sub-zero Freezer the size of two football fields causes you to snatch every calorie you can get, because calories produce heat. I did a three day water fast about two weeks ago, it was good but at the time I didn't have a juicer-so it ended abruptly with a Chicken dinner. I felt like a real failure when I stuffed my face with that chicken dinner.
Yesterday, after I purchased the juicer I went to the grocery store and got two bags of apples, a pineapple, a Cantaloupe, a bag of carrots, and 2 gallons of distilled water. All together it was approximately knowledge cipher dollars. It was a good idea. I feel the effects already-it's definitely cleaning me out. Today I'm gonna get some vegetables to juice. Fruits are 'cleansers' and 'vegetables' are builders-some days I'll clean and some days I'll build. I haven't decided how long I'm going to do this juice fast but I have made an agreement with myself to really renew my 41 year old physical form.
I've never really been a 'foodie', but I recognize the need to renew the history of my physical body. I eat meat and I will proudly eat a steak at a vegan convention and not give a damn what the foodies think. So between the steak, the weed, the beer, the chicken, the liquor, the fish, the pancakes, the pizza, the eggs, the milk, and everything else besides pork-I know it's time for a major cleansing, and time to renew.
I don't have but one body-there are no more after this one, so I need to take care of it-and part of that is removing the garbage thoroughly.
The first day of the Juice fast went extremely well, plenty of freshly squeezed juice and distilled water. I feel calm and at peace. I'm about to juice a cantaloupe and a pineapple for breakfast.
May 6th: Day 2
Made some cabbage, broccoli, carrots and apples juice. I'm very hungry right now and the cabbage, broccoli, carrot and apple juice tasted nasty. The fruit juices tasted great, but my overall disposition right now is cranky and hungry. I'm thinking about this Chinese buffet I go to-I knockz 'em for 5 plates every time. I killz 'em. Sometime I go to this other place that makes soul food, and usually get a chicken breast and a thigh, potato salad, macaroni and a roll. It'z good, and when I'm in the mood for fish I go to this one place that makes this Jumbo fried fish sandwich with french fries. It's great. Or sometimes I go to this breakfast Buffet-I kill them too, but in the end I know I'm killing myself. I don't want to have a stroke, or catch diabetes. I already suffer from a bad temper and high blood pressure so I need to start paying better attention to what I put in my mouth. I can't believe I'm gonna be 42 next year-I remember turning 22 yesterday, time truly moves at a terrific speed. Health in those 40's is an issue, mathematically speaking I could realistically be in the last 20 years of my life's Quran. Admittedly I don't eat right: I eat meat, I drink beer and liquor, I smoke weed and I get a Black and Mild from time to time. I'm not gutted, my appearance is still relatively youthful, I'm physically strong but I know I'm not 'healthy'-healthy. I'm not sick or anything, but it doesn't take a vegan foodie to tell me I haven't been eating right. I eat a lot but not right. Juice fasting for only two days I can already feel the texture of my hair soften a bit, my toe nails, and fingernails are clear and I feel sharper mentally. We bury ourselves under a lot of bad foods, which causes stiffness in joints, arthritis and other ailments and I feel the justice after a meal at the buffet. A few days ago at a restaurant I'm watching this fat white boy lift his fork like a shovel over and over again, slowly digging his grave. That fat white boy was a sign to me, to get healthy 'food wise'. I never been an advocate of that vegetarian and vegan math-I respect them, but I don't want to go there: I enjoy food: steak in particular-so Instead of going to a vegan extreme I prefer to juice fast and after the fast I'll willfully continue to juice regularly and increase my fruit and vegetable intake.
May 7th: Day 3: 5:40 A.M.
It's 5:40 in the morning and last night was rough. A detox headache occurs when the body is releasing toxins at a fast rate. My body is not use to cleaning itself out radically, my body has become one with the toxins that are in the wrong foods, so when I start to release them 'withdraw' is a natural part of the process. Last night my headache was bad-I felt like I was going to have a stroke and die. Now the headache is gone and I do feel good. My mind feels clear and at ease. Since I suffer from high blood pressure I can feel that the internal anxiety, a latent worrying in my subconscious is gone, now I'm feeling calm and at ease. Getting through the detox headache was the toughest test thus far. Hunger is not really that bad-I'm not hungry and to be in control of hunger truly feels Godly. Food is called 'God degree' by us for a reason and implying the questions: Have we mastered food? Or have we fallen victim to the magnetic power of appetite and food. Food is magnetic, it has attracting power, greater than any drug-hunger calls us, and internally hunger can manifest itself as the wild beast-"...or fed to a wild beast..." The wild beast can be connected to our appetite. When I'm at a buffet I lose the knowledge of my self and kill that Chinese lately for 5 or 6 full plates, Once after I came outta there I just sat in the truck for 15 minutes before I put the key in the ignition because I was so full:That'z some straight beast life shit. "What is his own self?" Is a degree that has been on my third. Why because the wrong foods have caused me to be other than myself, all those toxins have stored up in the cells of my body-damn right, these toxins produce a negative disposition. Easily one can fall victim to an 'other than Self' disposition. As God and Earth we are divine beings-'Divine' are those things held sacred-when we refuse to hold our physicals sacred we sacrifice to a large extent our own personal divinity. Divine or Destroy represents 'D' in my Supreme Alphabet to imply that their are two cultures: 'Divine' or 'Destroy'. We have the choice to place emphasis on either 'Divine' or 'Destroy'. Vegans, consider what they put in their mouth to the slightest ingredient. That is an admirable characteristic. Me? I will drink Pepsi, or a Tahitian Treat and not think twice. Vegans can get on your nerves, but they point to the possibility of you becoming a better you. Now don't get me wrong, Vegans have just as many problems as anyone else, b.u.t. nevertheless they pretty much have a mastery of the science of food. Food is a central issue in my life, it always has been. My mother said I was a greedy baby from the time I was born. The family use to call me 'no neck' because I didn't have a neck-my eyes would be wide-I was wild when I saw food. I'm surprised I'm not obese-I came up very athletic, a whole lotta sports, heavy weight lifting as a teenager blessed me essentially with an athletic physical form.
I just drank power cups of pineapple, apple, and cantaloupe juice. It was real good! I also bought a 15 pound bag of potatoes and a pound of yams-yams are expensive. I'll drink that tonight. Juice has mow become my breakfast lunch and dinner. I feel real good, I'm in the process of spring cleaning the crib and juicing has helped me with extra energy to handle that task. When you juice, I've noticed that your surroundings become a direct reflection of your internal reality. The more you evacuate the toxins in the body, the more you will evacuate the toxins in your physical environment. Mathematics is the Universal language from cell to cell, meaning when you clean the cells within the body-the language of light(intelligence) will be emitted from one cell to the next cell. A cell is a cipher, any cipher from the smallest to the largest will be affected.
May 7th:-5:40 P.M. (3rd day)
I did a lot of spring cleaning, drank 5 more cups of Pineapple, Apple and cantaloupe juice about an hour ago. I've noticed that fasting has caused a restlessness. A restlessness that stems from North America eating habits that have become second nature. We center our lives around meals: Breakfast; lunch; and dinner literally represent various times of the day. I juiced this morning and I juiced around the culture hour and I feel restless, it's my subconscious programming I suspect. My body is basically wondering, "Yo where da food at dude-what is this juice shit?". The appetite of man is a beast-it is the intelligence of the human being that separates man from beast. We are usually led by the appetite, it controls us and leads us in many cases in the wrong direction. Regardless if the body is craving sex, water or food, all of which are essential appetite forces that the physical form craves. How we cope with these ideas represent us in a very personal way. Your sex life is nobodies business, you don't want anyone coughing over your food or spitting back-wash into what it is you're drinking. Why? Because that's your personal space. Appetite is a personal subject but ultimately how we engage appetite defines all of us on a very basic level. The appetite has a direct relationship to the human will. Fasting is to deny one's self food-upon doing this we exercise the human will. And the struggle becomes a clash of your interpersonal will versus personal appetite. Appetite is the 'beast', it has no regard for intellect. Stating this, I don't mean that to shun the majestic beauty of the appetite: Food is good, sex is great, water is of vital significance to life-so to deny anyone of these appetite based forces in the 'Self' is to exercise the 'will' in the 'Self'. Denial of any essential aspect of the appetite should not be associated with piety or righteousness. We should as scientist associate overcoming the appetite with righteous elevation if we so choose. One should be mindful that such a practice of fasting is an exercise of the human will. The will is aligned with the Universal Mind like a match to gasoline and similarly a 'fast' can be applied to day to day life is potentially explosive. We are all presented with obstacles, hills and mountains within our lives. Hills and mountains are actual facts that we have to climb daily in life. We all have a Mount Everest to climb; We learn to make it rain during thirsty times in life-it is our will that we must tap. Tapping the will is to open up the universe from within, human will contrasts human appetite-appetite is a gravitational force. Appetite is correlative to forces within the Earth. When You think of the Black woman you think of Earth, containing all the vital resources necessary for survival: food, water, and sex- six 'sex'-tillion is her total weight representing procreation for the human being. This massive-weighted mass has a direct relationship to the attracting power of gravitation. Water is the piece with magnetic-thirst is the piece without; food is the piece with the magnetic-hunger is the piece without; Sex is divinely magnetic, to be 'sex less' is to be without magnetism. The appetite pursues, while the will attracts. To reverse the magnetic polarity of these forces is to assert the will-upon asserting the will you take control of the force itself. Thus you can cause Rain, Hail, Snow and Earthquakes when you are in supreme control of your will.
May 8th: Day 4(Insightz): 1 A.M.
I'm laying here in bed thinking about understanding build: Then why did God make Devil? And I've essentially translated the idea of life's problems into 'Devil'(or any live grafted germ). In dealing with the concept of problems as devil I've realized that the only problems we really have are based upon things, people, ideas and values that we have some sort of attachment to. You only can have a problem based upon the relativity of your attachment: Work; family; financial; relationship; health-are all entities revolving in one's personal circumference. Money is a social norm-a means of exchange-that can or cannot be a problem in our lives. The psychological relationship that we have to things , people and ideas usually cause problems because the problem has an emotional root, a connection to something or someone in which we have a vested emotional interest and the capacity by which it/they function in our lives can by default cause dysfunction in our lives. The problem is designed to reflect the degree of your knowledge. There is a solution to the emotional problem but the solution itself may or may not be necessarily rooted in the emotion. Emotional content may serve as impetus to solve a problem, however the actual solution itself in terms of procedure should be applied without emotion. If your life is in jeopardy such is an emotional situation, and the solution may be as logical as getting yourself out of harm's way.
A mother's child is in a burning house, and she goes in the house to save the child: the impetus for her to go in and save the child is indeed emotional b.u.t. every step she takes is in and of itself logical-or as logical as she can reason her steps out to be-given the situation. Ideally, emotional impetus should produce a logical path for solutions B.U.T. in most cases emotional impetus leads to an irrational emotional act. "...lost the knowledge of himself and is living a beast life..."-losing the knowledge of self is as simple as not being present in the moment, allowing things to register on an emotional level causing one to be used as a tool and also a slave by the emotional elements made by the problem. Emotional responses are like snakes that sting someone else thus compounding the problem. Then why did God make devil? Is a question that is in essence speaking to an introverted idea. Why did you make the problem?-the problem is made to show forth power, not egotistically but to in fact usher forth a greater U.
6:A.M. Journal Insightz (Day 4)
I rested well, and during my rest, a dream caught my third eye. In my dream I wrestled a whiteboy and made him submit with a Boston Crab hold. I'm not into wrestling-as you know I'm a boxing fan, so to be wrestling in a dream was interesting as well as odd and for me to make this whiteboy submit is even more interesting. When I awoke this morning, I got hit with a dose of fear, no particular fear-just fear. The last degree I remember building on in my third before I returned back to rest was the equality degree in the knowledge to understand equality: 'He Likes the devil because the devil gives him nothing'. Fear does not enter into the equation until the build degree upon which the idea of 'planted fear' comes into play.
Some people and many prisoners hide behind tattoos. 'Prisoners hide behind tats and muscles'-is what my cousin who is currently in prison wrote to me in a letter. He went on to say 'Most are just scared big guys'. That took me to 'Why does he fear the devil now that He is a Big Man?' And if you know the answer to that born degree you know fear is the result of what transpires in the knowledge Cipher's degree proposition 'Because the devil taught him how to eat the wrong foods.' All that freshly squeezed fruit juice and vegetable juice cleared all the shit outta me b.u.t. not the fear. I ain't take a shit yesterday(Pardon the visual) but my system as of now, I would speculate has evacuated just about all stored up waste, b.u.t. I get hit with this strange dose of fear this morning? I attribute it to the residual effects of the wrong foods. Though my digestive track is probably relatively clear, negative energy remains in my cell structure, nonetheless still lingering around on a vibrational level within the cell- meaning 'fear' is still in my cells and in me. Mathematics is the Universal Language from cell to cell, implying that math conveys messages on a cellular level hence 'cell to cell'. The message of fear is still affecting the cell structure and consequently my thought patterns. The wrong foods as we know make an individual other than 'Self', meaning that the body, comprised of all of it cells, turns away from it's original nature. And for the Self to turn back to the 'True Self' requires a complete revolution-a revolt, an internal struggle, a war, a jihad against the 'negativity' that is fear. Fear buries us in a mental grave, and thus I am literally covered in the toxic dirt as the result of the wrong foods. Surface dirt is one thing but the pins of fear are embedded deep in the psyche, causing wounds to the psyche. When we state the Black Man is God or the Black Woman is Earth we're merely stating titles. The human being wearing the title in most cases is very much wounded from the pins embedded in their heads(psyches) from the past. Fear runs deeper than the mere cleansing of the digestive track, fear runs wild on the cellular level. Fear is in the fabric of our internal organs, our skin, our expressions and our wayz and actionz. The whole body must be replaced one cell at a time-with an overhauled nutritional format, coupled with a renewed thought process. Repetitive thought is reinforced in the cell and by changing the Supreme Mathematical message from cell to cell we revamp our total way of being. Negative thoughts in Self have festered, multiplied and grew, eventually becoming 'other than Self'. To turn those negative ideas around is to take full control of your cells and mental and physical cipher. Cells are the planets that are grown and made from the beginning in Self, proving that we are a Universe unto ourselves: Microcosms of the Macrocosm. Take the Devil off your planet.
May 9th: Day 5: 6:30 A.M.
I made it to the power day baby, and I feel great! Yesterday I had to work and for those that don't know I work in a freezer that'z 25 below, it getz cold as fuck. But I hung in there and actually had a good day percentage wise(work lingo). Yesterday morning I went to work, took two 32 ounce bottles of cabbage, potato, yam, celery and carrot juice. It tasted awful, and made me shiver and shake when I drank it. I can't explain to you how awful it was, b.u.t. guess what? It sent a surge of energy through me like no other. I could have knocked Mayweather the fuck out (just joking I can't fuck with Lil Floyd). That raw vegetable juice gave me a quick surge b.u.t. also consistent, sustainable energy throughout the day and my farts were powerful enough to evacuate the Staples Center. Word!!! That raw vegetable juice is no joke, it shows and proves the meaning of 'experimenting with high explosives'. Boom! After I got off work I juiced a pineapple, apples, and a cantaloupe. The combination of juices ran through me causing me to rush for the toilet. Yesterday I was under the false impression that I had cleaned my colon completely. Wrong? 64 ounces of raw, powerful cabbage, carrot, celery, potatoes, and yam juice coupled with another 32 ounces of Pineapple, apple, and cantaloupe juice showed and proved I was still very much full of shit. Wow! 'Get that poison out of your system' is my motto nowaday. I'm not hungry at all, in fact I'm very much at peace.
If you know me y'all know I desire to become a Hafiz of Quran one day and I practice it much like an instrument, sometimes I'm very consistent, and sometimes I might miss three dayz and have some mediocre practice sessions. When I miss three days of not reciting Quran, or Ayat dhikir(repetitive recital of an ayat-line work) I get disgusted with myself. This morning I got up and did an extensive review-good recitation, line-work. 'Line-work' for an aspiring Hafiz is like hitting a speed bag for a boxer-it's timing and rhythm. This morning my Holy Quran work-out was fulfilling. Peep this! Last night I whooped my computer's ass in chess. I've beaten the computer before, b.u.t. not without taking back moves after I blundered. Last night I didn't take back any movez, and I was moving quick as fuck- no blunders. This is indeed a powerful experience mentally. I did get pissed for a second about some shit-and I've resolved to handle that shit in person...
"I wrote some really ill shit, that due to a tentative peace agreement-I've omitted from day 5-but best believe 'If' I get wind of some fuckin' Innuendo-the Very extensive part of Day-5 will be published!!!"-Don't fuck wit Sha!
May 10th Day 6.
2 A.M.
Yesterday I did plenty juicing, I juiced grapes, strawberries, apples, tangerines and later, for my vegetables I made Broccoli, cabbage, cauliflower, carrot, cucumber, and potato juice-vegetable juice is not good at all. It's downright awful.
5 P.M. I got in a very heated argument this morning with a family member-that got really ugly. When I'm in an argument I'm completely Nuclear! Ain't no 'in betweenz'-same with a fight, before I lose-we're gonna both lose. Fasting makes you incredibly mean during an argument. You're already hungry and you add that with the fact that somebody wantz to get on some bullshit. My Old Dad is the same way. He, like me, will draw his pistol at the drop of a hat and I heard him tell his wife once fuck your dead mama and fuck your dead daddy. The argument I was in was completely therapeutic, at least for me it was. The argument showed and proved that toxicity exists on multiple levels. This morning I apologized to my neighbors in the apartment building I live in, I already have a voice that carries, so when you multiply that with hostility, anger-my voice carries even further.
Nothing was resolved, and outside of some miraculous act from a mystery God that does not exist-I think the closeness between me and said relative is pretty much done. And how I deal with that is by just remembering the good times-that makes it all worth while. The relationship between me and said family member had become toxic due to what I feel was the interjection of a third family member. It's all good-right now I'm in a place of unparalleled clarity and my position is-is if you don't start none won't be none.
Now the other event in my life was the formation of a kidney stone, as the result of all that raw unfiltered juice. I juice the pineapple rhines, the grapevine, the potato skins, cabbage, cantaloupe rhines-I don't peel that shit when I put it in the juicer, so what it did is that foam on top of the juice calcified and a stone in my right kidney started to form. I had kidney stones before, nearly 15 years ago and it was the worst pain of my life, next to losing my eye of course. The kidney stone had me on the ground crying my ass off, I thought it was the result of push-ups and that I had pulled a muscle or something. You won't believe me, but I did 1200 push-ups straight once approximately 13 years ago. I know yall think I'm lying but I'm not. What I did is I did one push-up on New Years Day and I increased 1 push a day for a year. By April of that year I was able to bust out like 200 and after more time had elapsed I was knocking out 800 straight-easy, and once I got high, and did as many as I could and ended up doing 1200 straight. The world record for push-ups is held by Minoru Yoshida of Japan set in 1980-he did 10,507 push-up. Emblem is coming for you Minoru. Shit I can’t do 75 nowaday, b.u.t. I'm gonna get my Old ass back in shape though.
Back to the kidney stones: the Earth told me to drink 2 ounces of lemon juice, 2 ounces of vinegar, and 2 ounces of olive oil-that shit gone. I don't feel no pain. 'How to keep her Husband' she truly showed and proved that degree.
Tomorrow I'm gonna be steppin' on my first milestone of my juice fast baby: Da God day-day 7. Buy a juicer and join me.
May 11th: Day 7
12:51 A.M
I started this juice fast on May 4th and completed my first day on May 5th and Now I've done seven dayz. I've done seven days before and it's alwayz a milestone when you touch down on your first complete week of fasting. I'm up early as you can see. I went to rest at the born hour and I feel like I've rested an entire night. That Vinegar and lemon juice seems to have really worked in dissolving that kidney stone. I have no pain in my back b.u.t the fact of the matter is-is that the vinegar nauseated the fuck outta me. I wanted to throw up but I guess I had nothing to throw up and I still got that vinegar after taste which tasted disgusting. My stomach feels unsettled, and weird, however, mentally I don't feel bad. I had a real good Quran work-out yesterday, and somehow fasting is tuning my voice pitch nicely. I'm hitting notez in that Quran that I would not ordinarily be able to, and sounding good, if I may say so myself. When I get back to repetitive, hardcore line work which is reciting each ayat 99 timez that'z when I'm really back in the Quran gym. After repetitively reciting 6236 verses 99 timez I will be on my way to Qari then Hafiz. I know yall Gods and Earthz like "This brother is deeply into the Quran." You damn right, the flow is tight and it's Islam. Scientist are suppose to extract the understanding which is the best part from the Quran, Torah, Bible, an Algebra Book, or a calculus book. I mean we do study 'Said' Muslim lessons and then draw them up with Supreme Math and Supreme Alphabet. The Quran is the ultimate said 'Muslim Lesson': is it not? It takes on a mathematical form from beginning to end. Hey, maybe it's just me, and If it's just me who has love for the Quran than I'm gonna come to North America Bymyself like a Movafuckin' champ baby. People should be allowed to expand their understanding as far as they desire it to go. This is a choice that remains up to the individual: to study as much or as little of what constitutes as the science of everything in life as they choose. Islam for the Original Man is not a 'religion' b.u.t. instead a way of life, a culture. Islam does exist as a religion, and if we are scientist, which indeed we are-it would be wise to examine the rituals which are based upon the substantative reality of truth. Religion is comprised of rituals. In the religion of Islam one is suppose to wash their ass at least five times a day. This is the only religion that points the human family in the direction of hygiene. If you take a shit, according to Islam- never dry wipe because you’re just smearing the shit with the toilet paper. The prescribed laws of Islam demands we wipe our ass with water. The religion of Islam contains many rituals that point toward male and female hygiene. So if you define yourself as God and Earth and your hygiene ain't right and exact, you might want to do the knowledge to the Islamic rules and regulations as they pertain to hygiene. It may help with living out I Self Lord and Master and I Sincerely Love Allah's Mathematics free from the grafted reality of having a shitty ass. Wipe with water!
Day 8-Here I come!
